I used to be very afraid of dogs – one day, when Ben was little a large dog jumped over our garden fence. I had to place myself inbetween the dog and the rest of my family. Since then I’ve made an effort to be friendly to dogs when we visit friends who have a dog – I’m not really fraid anymore.

When I visited Quispamsis for the first time I had a very strange experience one night. I can only describe it as an apparition. I decided at a later time that this experience was about reaching out and touching my fears. Now, as I wake on the week when we move to Canada I am set on a headon collision course with my fears. Fears of not being about to support my family. The fear of failure. Even though many people confirm that this step we are taking is of God, that (in my book) doesn’t necessarily equate with success, whatever that is. I’ve often wondered how Abraham felt when God asked him to leave his land and his family – God was asking him to leave all the things he was dependant upon and to become depeandant upon God – did he have complete confidence that God would work everything out? Was he anxious? Nervous?

When we moved to Vancouver in 2000 I had none of these nerves. This time it’s a different story. I have fears, but I am reaching out to touch them.